Thanksgiving

So yesterday was Thanksgiving. 
As usual, it was filled with great family time and, of course, great food. It was a good day. To my question "What are you thankful for?", my son declared "I'm thankful for my sister!" <aweee> He is such a sweet boy, and of all the things he could have said, he mentioned his little sis first...I was touched. And it got me thinking...family is always going to be your family. No matter what. You can't get away from it. You're stuck! Hopefully, stuck in a good way...They are the people you rely on in times of need, and they are the people you want to share your most wonderful moments in life with. Family rules! I'm happy my son, even at his tender age of just 4 years old, finds his little sis to be his biggest blessing.

As for me, I'm thankful for my wonderful hubs and my kids. They are the precious gift from God, for which I can't thank Him enough. I'm also so very grateful for my family, near and far, who love me and care for me in so many ways. I'm thankful for our church family, who never fail to support us, guide us, and walk with us in faith. I'm beyond blessed with some pretty cool friends. They are spread all over the world, but nonetheless, they are always here for me when I need them, and I always keep a secure cozy spot for them in my heart. And did I mention the neighbors? They're pretty great, too!!! :) So many great relationships and experiences to be thankful for!!!! But most of all, I'm thankful for the ultimate gift, the gift of salvation. God is so good and compassionate that He has sacrificed His only Son for us to be saved from the eternal wrath and instead gain the eternal life. Wow. Who can top that? Definitely a major reason to celebrate!!!!


But as we gathered at a family dinner table yesterday at my hub's parents' house, I couldn't help but miss my own family. My Mom and Dad...my sister and her little clan...my grandparents....I was sad. Don't get me wrong, my husband's family rocks, and I love them wholeheartedly. But looking at them being so happy together, enjoying the company of each other, watching the siblings' interaction, and especially, having both parents there...it just got me teary-eyed and sad that I won't have that any longer with my side of the family...my Dad will not be playing with his grand kids and he will not witness them grow and mature...and I won't be sitting next to my Dad, having my head on his shoulder...and my Dad won't be cooking his famous meals for us...A part of my family puzzle is lost, and it won't be complete anymore...
This feeling of envy and sadness on such nice holiday caught me off guard.

I miss my Dad. I feel sorry for my Mom. I pity my grandparents who feel guilty and that they deserved to go first. I sympathize with my sister who is torn between her own family and job responsibilities and my Mom's needs right now. I just feel a little unwell and guilty myself that I should be doing more, being there for them, providing answers and solutions. I know it's not up to me, and I can only do so much being thousands of miles away. I just wish things weren't so complicated. I wish I could do somethings significant for all of them. 

So it was a very nice holiday, but with a touch of sad. I think a lot of things to come will have this kind of "touch" to them...it's natural, and it's inevitable. I have to be prepared and welcome these sad feelings with gratitude--I have been blessed with a GREAT Dad!!! The memories of him are warm and touching and not the other way around...I have a great family back home. I have a great family here. I have so much to be thankful for, and so I am.